Just for Xeets and Giggles (7.20.24)

This week was not exactly, shall we say, a slow news week.

There was the shock of the initial news of the attack on Trump.

My own feed was filled with the news, along with the occasional person who either hadn’t heard or somehow shrugged it off.

Then there were those who heard about the attack only through memes.

It’s important in these times to be able to lighten the mood, even at the expense of our own candidate.

And for those who saw his press conference…

I personally think we should own the fact that Biden is old and makes gaffes. Far better than being old and found guilty of 34 felonies and liable for sexual assault, but maybe that’s just me.

There was immediately a great deal of irony at quick work.

There was also a fast leap by the right to blame the attack on Democratic rhetoric— until they discovered the shooter was a registered Republican and gun lover who also had pictures of Biden, Jeffries and Fani Willis on his phone.

The events coincided with the release of Katy Perry’s new single, so this guy’s tweet aged rather poorly.

The reviews for the single were scathing, so…

And then, the true absurdity began with the overhyping of his Trump’s near martyrdom.

There was the oft-repeated phrase from MAGA that he “took a bullet for this country.” That had to be addressed.

The gross lionization of this man just had to be stuffed into a bag.

Along with the idea that he’s somehow a hero.

Also, Mike Pence would like a word.

There has curiously been no medical or doctor’s report released since the attack, which is a major failure by the media to follow up.

This lack of a report is telling, because if it really was a bullet rather than, say, shards of plastic or glass from something else…

So perhaps it was a bullet injury, perhaps it was something else that struck him, but either way that ear bandage became a new kind of badge of honor.

They want to immortalize him this way, so…

Trump showed up at the RNC sporting the bandage. Folks had thoughts.

Then the MAGA started MAGAing.

This summed up my thoughts on it.

Preach, Ms. Thelma.

The memes truly made it worth it.

And this also had to be said.

One of my favorites right here.

And where can I get this puzzle?

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On the first day of the convention, Trump announced his pick for VP. He had to pick a new one, you see.

The commentary was on point. Rep. Eric Swalwell (D-CA) for the TD.

And the extra point here:

And from another perspective,

And whoever did this is a genius.

Vance’s past hatred of Trump didn’t go unnoticed, of course. The Daily Show pulled it all together.

America’s Hitler, huh?

The pick was an odd one, given that it didn’t seem to shore up any soft points for Trump with voters.

Beyond the fascism and racism, there’s also the weirdoism. AOC brought it up and the internet delivered.

On behalf of America, I say, “Huh?”

I don’t know why saying this about JD Vance’s name is so funny, but I couldn’t stop giggling.

MAGA tried to elevate both him and his family, and that went well.

I loved this.

It was Don Jr. who introduced his pal, JD Vance, to the convention goers. The gays were on the job.

Trump appeared to fall asleep during JD Vance’s riveting speech.

This crossed my feed around the same time.

And poor wannabe VP Sen. Tim Scott. Can we forget him now?

Eric Trump’s speech had a very special, perfect moment.

All the “Mass Deportation” signs, claims that God saved Trump (but killed the bystander?), and $299 “Fight fight fight!” assassination attempt sneakers aroused talk of a unique MAGA fascism.

George Conway for the Trumpy tie-in:

Oh, this one got me good.

There were some other weird highlights from the convention…

Apparently, there was a lot of closeted Grindr action from the Republican men descending on Milwaukee. This clip was perfect.

But the most memorable image from the night has got to be Matt Gaetz’s new look.

No shade on the tiger dads, but…

The before and after shots were priceless.

For those who don’t watch RPDR,

Brutal and correct here:

This comparison was inevitable.

I have to share this daughter/dad interaction. Best of the internet right here, with an assist from a guy with an unfortunate name right now.

The fun continued…

Uh, they chose this guy to introduce Trump for his acceptance speech.

Speaking of Marjorie Three Names, she was busy spinning her conspiracies in spectacular form.

With his much anticipated speech, Trump started talking. Then he kept talking and talking…

People stopped listening and started tweeting.

He wound up saying nothing about Project 2025, which seems kinda worried about all the sunlight that’s been shining on it lately.

In other news, Judge Aileen “Loose” Cannon dismissed the espionage and obstruction case on the first day of the RNC because she’s apparently auditioning for SCOTUS.

And honorable mention for worst human ever, Elon Musk, decided he would endorse Trump after all.

He also said he’d donate $45 million a month to help Trump get elected. Way to use that Tesla money, Elon!

Musk also said he was moving his companies out of California because he (checks notes) didn’t like the state’s new trans protection laws. The Slate account rocked him hard for that.

He’s off to Texas now, but never forget:

Musk also showed how fundamentally dumb he is. People didn’t let him skate.

With all the division and political strife, there was this shining moment of unity. [Warning: Your pets may bray in protest.]

It was really this bad.

We wish her a life and career recovery.

In other news, there was an outage that wasn’t Microsoft’s fault but still crippled many of their systems, causing worldwide system chaos.

If you get the above joke, you are old.

By the way, we checked in on Clippy. Times are hard.

And now, a brief peek into what went on in animal world. The Democrats could use this doggo’s energy and enthusiasm in the race.

It’s been a tough week, so this is for all of us.

This is a classic video, but with voiceover. I love this genre. Full seal of approval.

Back to us humans for a moment. This clip really spoke to me.

This is also 2024 in a nutshell:

And I hadn’t seen this clip before somehow.

This stand-up comic predicted our future.

I need to try this the next time when a crazy person comments about microchips in vaccines.

And it’s not a dad joke, but it is a dad move. I may need to try this technique in a few years!

Whew! That was a long one. Hope you made it to the end! If you did, don’t forget to tip the writer by becoming a paid supporter (if you aren’t one already) and can afford to buy me a coffee each month!

Jay