Just for Xeets and Giggles (08.24.24)

Good morning from baby watch in San Diego! Today is officially her due date, but she’s taking her sweet time. (We will induce labor next week sometime if she remains stubborn—this is a common practice and safety measure with IVF children, the doctor told us.)

There was plenty to keep me occupied this week, of course. Let’s rewind to before the start of the amazing DNC.

Donald Trump decided to go back on the campaign trail with outdoor rallies.

It had to be said.

Here’s another apt comparison.

If Trump is a vegetable, he’s surely a carrot, right?

Other folks had thoughts about the clear double standard here.

And then this happened.

This summed up my own thoughts well.

Trump keeps trying to be the candidate of law and order.

And it keeps backfiring.

This was supposed to be the AI election, and so far this is all we’re getting.

It does however have its upsides.

Few could not notice how much better Harris is around our furry friends.

Remarks Harris made about eating a whole bag of Doritos after the 2016 election—and now sharing any with her husband Doug—went viral.

The Internet is fast.

As we enter the fall, it’s pumpkin spice everything time, so be mindful and demure about your holiday decor.

Oh, and President Joe Biden showed he still has it.

And all that family support for Harris and Walz is starting to get to MAGA.

This is the part where I nudge you to become a paid supporter if you aren’t already one!

As the DNC geared up, most were already solidly committed to the ticket.

Chicago got ready Chicago style.

And it soon became clear that the DNC was not at all the RNC.

Even the roll call of states was epic, with a DJ spinning a playlist of states and Lil Jon performing “Turn Down for What.” Here’s a good summary of the vibe.

Up north a bit, Harris and Walz decided to troll the RNC with a rally of their own.

Michelle Obama lit up the crowd and tore 45 a new you know what.

Many were fine with the change in tone.

Everyone was talking about this moment, and even if you’ve seen it, it’s worth watching again while observing his comedic timing here.

The meme of all presidential memes had to come back out.

Narrator: He made a dick joke.

And so did many.

Gwen Walz began to steal the show whenever they cut to her, and folks began to talk about casting options.

Is it just a Midwestern thing to exude such natural joy?

Everyone had a good sense of humor about themselves.

Sen. Elizabeth Warren wiped tears from her eyes as the crowd gave her a hero’s welcome. Then she dropped this on them.

Sen. Mark Kelly will help keep Arizona in the blue column, especially with takes like this.

And there was this amazing moment.

Meanwhile, watching all this fun and excitement, MAGA kept trying to rain on the party. Sorry, Donald. We’re speaking. We’re speaking.

Best photo bomb of the year goes to this fellow. AANHPI represent! Click here to watch.

Night three belonged to Gus Walz, whose pride for his dad moved the non-deplorable half of America to tears. Meanwhile, over in Deplorastan…

Wait… drink?!

Oh, and Trump is 78, and Barron is 18. I’d say do the math, but I know it’s hard.

A false rumor spread like wildfire about a special guest appearance on Day 4 of the convention.

There was so much talk of Beyoncé that her people had to put out a denial.

But if not Queen Bee, then…?

TMZ was the outlet with the fake news reporting, so this was fitting.

Honestly, this wouldn’t surprise me.

There were lessons to be learned from the way that rumor snowballed.

This was my favorite.

By the time Kamala Harris took the stage to give her very presidential, very powerful speech, Donald Trump was back to rage posting. This was the funniest one. You can hear it in his voice.

Sensing how vulnerable he is on the issue of abortion, Trump is trying to put lipstick on the Dobbs pig.

Next up is the debate on September 10. I vote for this:

So, through all of this, where was JD Vance? Besides proving he’s incapable of even ordering donuts, that is. This woman behind the counter is all of us.

Speaking of Mr. Couch Potato, there’s a guy out there making videos like this. (TikTok alternative link here.)

To no one’s surprise, on Friday RFK Jr.’s brain worm told him to drop out of the race.

The reaction was predictable.

My only regret is along these lines.

He was always good for fresh material!

Women are having a strong moment, and Bette Midler is loving it.

Speaking of pink and white symbols…

There was some great news on the internet belly / sexual predator find out side of things:

It didn’t last long with JK, sadly. She tweeted this yesterday because, well, she’s apparently under some kind of Imperius Curse. Nah, she just sucks.

She does know that she has to face trial for cyberbullying and internet defamation in Paris soon, right? And that it could carry a prison sentence?

Or maybe…

My thoughts on all this, summed up well here.

Speaking of bullying female Olympic gold medalists, the Daily Mail showed it has no shame. But the Community Notes were ready.

Speaking of the UK, this politician, who has criticized gay people for talking about their sexuality, tweeted just a single word.

Since he made himself fair game with his hypocrisy…

There’s an old saying popular in the patriarchy about bad times and hard men. It needed a more modern context. Ah, there it is.

With so many humans acting badly, we could all use a lesson in sweet kindness. It’s animal time! I mean, just look at this kitty.

Heroes don’t always wear capes, but they sometimes have tails and wear… shoes? Check out this moment caught on camera.

Speaking of moments caught on camera, I can’t stop giggling watching this.

This pup threw a perfect tantrum.

Your awww moment for the week:

In fairness, animals can be pretty naughty, too. Sibling abuse may have peaked here. (TikTok alternative link here.)

This cat is just as clever, but it got busted…

At least this bear wants to leave the world a better place.

Random silly seal face squishies, maybe the cutest thing you’ll see this week.

Okay, one political moment courtesy of this doggo. (TikTok link here.)

In these times, we sometimes have to ask. Are men okay?

I mean, Exhibit 2 here, but if this is what it takes to have honest communication, let’s roll with it.

Faith a bit restored here, at least for dads of little girls.

Your ear worm for the week, brought to you by global warming.

This took me a sec, but then I found it amazing.

This was literally me the other day.

I’ll see myself out with this dad joke.

Have a great weekend! And if you want to contribute to my baby clothes and night nanny fund, you can upgrade your account or give my newsletter as a gift!

Jay