Man I needed that. I do love that Kamala Harris is living rent free in Trump's head. We've been waiting 9 long years for someone who can finally rattle him.
Lost in the Arnold Palmer incident was the way he growled, “And I REALLY love women”. This coming from the guy who said he popped Tic Tacs so he could kiss them without their consent and grab them by the pussy, because they let you do it when it when you’re a star. And who has been credibly accused by 18:women of sexual assault.
I saw a comment somewhere by someone who seemed to have some professional knowledge of the subject who said that Trump exhibited signs of a condition that suggested he was genetically XXY. The symptoms I recall were the way he leans forward (also symptom of frontotemporal dementia) & inability to grow facial hair. Oh, another was small hands. 1 or more of the following may also apply, intemperate behavior or lack of inhibition, small genitals & attraction to both semesters.
How ironic it would be that Trump himself is an exhibition that refutes the frequent MAGA claim there are 2 sexes only! There are several genotypes besides just XX & XY. And there are other genes & chromosomes besides X & Y that affect sexual expression.
"Semesters" should be "sexes". My autocorrupt changed it twice. I caught one but didn't notice the other. I don't see anywhere to edit it at this point.
I remember reading somewhere that this is why it stopped being SOP for genetics students to examine their own chromosomes in the course of their studies: too many of them discovered that how they identified didn't match what their chromosomes said. Identity crises on top of rigorous exams and coursework must have had the student clinics and nearby clinics working overtime.
There was a story, perhaps apocryphal, that Carson once asked Winnie Palmer what she did to bring Arnir good luck before he teed off, “I kiss his balls,” replied Mrs. Palmer. “I bet that made his putter stand on end,” quipped Carson.
💯 His voice makes me want to vomit, but especially when he gets that weird, sing-song tone—like when he says, “Chyyna virus.” I “looovvve women.” You know of which I speak.
The cat behind the door was the best cat video I've seen in YEARS, and I'm always up for a good math joke--never mind Trump giving us some great dick jokes. Way to go, Jay!
I. CAN'T. STOP. LAUGHING.!!! I actually subscribed to your substack after seeing a previous Xeets and Giggles. I thought that's what your substack was all about!! What a surprise to find out that you are a wise political commentators, as well. LOL!!!
Thank you for writing these every week, because they help me cope with the anxiety that the rest of the week has produced. Some weeks I have a favourite, but this week, I love them all! Many thanks!
Don't get me wrong, I loved all of these, especially the "political" jokes. But the woman who couldn't get her dessert out of the plastic cup, and then once it was discovered the lid was still attached, only to have the whole thing plop down in her lap spoke to me. I am that woman!
Man I needed that. I do love that Kamala Harris is living rent free in Trump's head. We've been waiting 9 long years for someone who can finally rattle him.
I really do want him to buy into all the fake info about Kamala's past jobs.
Lost in the Arnold Palmer incident was the way he growled, “And I REALLY love women”. This coming from the guy who said he popped Tic Tacs so he could kiss them without their consent and grab them by the pussy, because they let you do it when it when you’re a star. And who has been credibly accused by 18:women of sexual assault.
(and another 100+++ who haven't come forward)
I feel violated every time I hear him speak.
That's an interesting comment. I've never thought about it, but I do, too.
Maybe the hyper aggression towards women is to compensate for his true desire to be f....d by Arnold Palmer.
The reason he fixated on Palmer is because - according to eye-witness Stormy Daniels - he has "a small mushroom" down here.
She did, indeed, say that.
Oh, I can’t unread that comment! 🤮
The King and the would-be King.
I saw a comment somewhere by someone who seemed to have some professional knowledge of the subject who said that Trump exhibited signs of a condition that suggested he was genetically XXY. The symptoms I recall were the way he leans forward (also symptom of frontotemporal dementia) & inability to grow facial hair. Oh, another was small hands. 1 or more of the following may also apply, intemperate behavior or lack of inhibition, small genitals & attraction to both semesters.
How ironic it would be that Trump himself is an exhibition that refutes the frequent MAGA claim there are 2 sexes only! There are several genotypes besides just XX & XY. And there are other genes & chromosomes besides X & Y that affect sexual expression.
"Semesters" should be "sexes". My autocorrupt changed it twice. I caught one but didn't notice the other. I don't see anywhere to edit it at this point.
"Autocorrupt", I like that.
I remember reading somewhere that this is why it stopped being SOP for genetics students to examine their own chromosomes in the course of their studies: too many of them discovered that how they identified didn't match what their chromosomes said. Identity crises on top of rigorous exams and coursework must have had the student clinics and nearby clinics working overtime.
Putin. He has a daddy-dom thing.
There was a story, perhaps apocryphal, that Carson once asked Winnie Palmer what she did to bring Arnir good luck before he teed off, “I kiss his balls,” replied Mrs. Palmer. “I bet that made his putter stand on end,” quipped Carson.
No dimensions were discussed as far as I am aware
🥴🤣🤣🤣🤣
💯 His voice makes me want to vomit, but especially when he gets that weird, sing-song tone—like when he says, “Chyyna virus.” I “looovvve women.” You know of which I speak.
It’s intended to lull the cultists into a sort of hypnotized state IMO.
Apparently it does. I fucking shit you not: a coworker told me today that she’ll be in DC on January 20 for trump’s inauguration.
I think he’s going to be disappointed.
Bless her heart. Heart?
That low intellect whine!
And then.... of course.... Tucker Carlson said, "Hold my beer" and went on to his spanking rant.
26.... I think.
I finally figured out that was his way of saying “I’m not gay even though I’m about to give glowing praise to another guy’s junk”
This has been a deeply, deeply weird week in a string of deeply, deeply weird weeks.
Not to mention deeply DISTURBING!
I count 27 October surprises in 27 days.
Whew! I needed this laugh break! Thank you!
You do such a great job of curating -- I look forward to this all week and you never let us down! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!
The cat behind the door was the best cat video I've seen in YEARS, and I'm always up for a good math joke--never mind Trump giving us some great dick jokes. Way to go, Jay!
Jay’s column is just what I needed on the morning after Bezos sold his integrity on Prime. Check out the Borowitz Report on Substack!
I. CAN'T. STOP. LAUGHING.!!! I actually subscribed to your substack after seeing a previous Xeets and Giggles. I thought that's what your substack was all about!! What a surprise to find out that you are a wise political commentators, as well. LOL!!!
lol! This is my bonus piece each week!
((( )))
Thank you for writing these every week, because they help me cope with the anxiety that the rest of the week has produced. Some weeks I have a favourite, but this week, I love them all! Many thanks!
Although the twins in the Halloween Weiner costume is probably my favourite, as I have a pack of dachshunds here!
One of the best things I’ve read in many moons! Hilarious!
Did you see the ad in the photo of the bumper sticker one? Double the laughs in one item. Thanks Jay!!
“Introducing our new orange chicken”
😂😂😂😂😂😂
lol!
Still giggling about my women’s club breakfast this morning, two women ordered “Arnold Palmers”.
🩵🩵
Don't get me wrong, I loved all of these, especially the "political" jokes. But the woman who couldn't get her dessert out of the plastic cup, and then once it was discovered the lid was still attached, only to have the whole thing plop down in her lap spoke to me. I am that woman!
Oh no!!
I loved her mother's expression throughout. And hers, too.
Oh boy did I need those videos. Made me laugh for the first time in weeks!
I look forward every week as my Saturday morning therapy you provide for all of us. And it only costs $1.20 per week!
Thank you for supporting my endeavors!
Great laughs! Thanks for keeping them coming, you’re a weekend highlight🙌
Love T as Hamburgler! Perfect image as a total goof.